Provincial Reconstruction Team

Unrepentantly postulating theoretical incursions into unknown territorial waters of knowledge and powerlessness. Usually starting an argument or debate, then going on a tangent and not completing...

Alternative histories, other ways of living.
Not being hooked into the 'system'.

Too alternative for the mainstream, but too mainstream for the alternative.

Then and now introducing some odious and divisive buzzwords in the tune of an eighties song for those with a tenuous grasp on modern history:

Mass shooting, proxy war

assassination, holocaust

Vietnam, J.F.K

World War II, M.L.K

Woodstock, Watergate

Cover-up, motorcade

Abdication, renegade

abortion clinic, hand grenade

Freedom fighter, terror raid

genocide, space race

9-11, Middle-East

religious clash, R.P.G

Suicide pact, W.M.D

AK-47, Wiki-leak

Israel, Palestine

Iron Curtain, Breadline

Northern Ireland, Yugoslavia

local conflict, deadly drama

Nepotism, abuse of power

trade dispute, napalm shower

Mates rate, space dust

date rapes, fake lust

We didn't start the fire... it was just a Billy Joel song.

The easiest way to get comments online, is to make a spelling mistake....

Guns or Butter?

Ours is NOT to do or die. 

Ours is just to reason WHY?

The stench of compromise is preferable to the stench of death*




 *except apparently, in case of every war or armed conflict that has ever been, is currently unfolding or will ever occur in the future.

Governments seem to spend far more on military armaments, than education, culture or measures to combat poverty. So spending many more dollars to start a war rather than to stop one. Prevention is better than the cure, unless that prevention is mutually assured destruction. Can't we all just get along? Well obviously not, but can't we all focus a little less on killing people who don't speak our language or participate in our "Free-trade" agreements? Ok well, it's not really so much, the people on the ground  in the populations who want to kill others, but somehow they always end up with leaders that would rather use soldiers than diplomacy. The two World Wars didn't need to happen, but I can hardly imagine how the world would be if they hadn't. The whole system was cruising for a bruising clash, to teach itself how bad war is. Nationalistic rivalries and imperialistic jealousies, seem to trump shared humanity when it comes to the crunch. Just do what the media tells you and it will all be fine, for them.

Whenever there is another unexplained tragic horrible shooting massacre, that seem to occur frequently. Blame violence in society caused by Hollywood, video games, the internet, trench coats, hidden messages in music, Gothic subcultures, or anything the kids are into these days. But never, ever, EVER... blame guns or threaten to restrict their distribution or sale, if you ever want to get elected in America. From my cold dead hands, but you have to kill me first and I have a cache that would make David Koresh a bit nervous. So blame Batman, and try to only use your AK only for self-defence, or turning off light bulbs.

Partially Privatised

Variety is obviously 'the spice of life', or so we've been told. But is it really? I mean really?

Or is it really...



Variety is the spice of inconsistency
Variety is the spice of sex
Variety is the luck of change
Variety is the way of nature
Variety is the business
Variety is difficult to categorise
Variety is hard to predict
Variety is not where you left it
Variety is the fuel of comedy
Variety is reason for our differences
Variety is unexpected and scary
Variety is just around the corner
Variety is coming next Tuesday
Variety is a vagabond
Variety is on a plate
Variety is magical
Variety is a word
Variety defies definition
Variety creates interesting juxtapositions
Variety hates uniformity and lists
Variety loves company and misery
Variety emits and submits
Variety deludes and excludes
Variety denies and supplies
Variety does what it wishes
Variety can be harmony
Variety will set you free
Variety is hard work
Variety rocks

The End Of History

You can find where these quotes came from yourself, I'm obviously admitting I didn't think them up originally, as some of them are quite famous or infamous in their own right or transitioning toward a common cliché for some. But one person's cultural touchstone, is another's idea of academic torture.  I could go on tangents at any time and frequently do. Some could have multiple sources. As it's all getting quite derivative and multi-layered in the world of everything. Pop will eat itself and we will all enjoy the show. So, why should I spoon feed you and say where they all came from? I mean we can all use a search engine these days, can't we?
I mean really.... Anyway quotey-time-time!

• Never on schedule, always on time.

• Jesus died for somebodies sins, but not mine.

• We have met the enemy and he is us.

• We are the music-makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.

• I was the Dreamweaver. But now I'm reborn. 

• No one's gonna love you more than I do.

• The things we fear most have already happened.

• Everything that's made, is made to decay.

• None of this matters.

Critical Thinking

It's raining and pouring down in an absolutely filthy way, where I am currently

I can hear rain attacking the windows and wind bullying trees outside.

But to tell you the truth it gives me an excuse to be inside and do eff all.

I mean I could be doing that with sun coming through the windows,

but it always makes me feel slightly guiltier, like I am wasting daylight or sun...

Yet, If I am doing something I want to do though, is there any harm or wastage?

Weather-related Mini-Playlist:

Take a Run at The Sun - Dinosaur Jr.

Catch the Sun - Doves

Catch Up in The Sun - Beach Pigs (NZ)

Book Car Service

Rantfest:


People stick to old familar ways...

Nothing dates faster than the ultramodern, the cutting-edge...

Don't want it how it is now, want it like a mythical past.







Suffix collections:


-als:

Fundamental
Environmental
Ecological
Economical
Social
Political
Financial
Philosophical
Visual
Aesthetical
Spiritual
Personal
Emotional
Existential


-tions:

Meditation
Concentration
Reflection
Motivation
Conception
Contemplation
Situation
starvation
Conservation
Promotion
Preservation
Consternation


-ines

Iodine
Equine
Asinine
Intestine
Nicotine
Caffeine
Codeine
Cocaine
Morphine
Nectarine
Crystalline
Submarine
Amphetamine



Bric vs Piigs:

Brazil
Russia
India
China

Portugal
Ireland
Italy
Greece
Spain




Random Bits:

"A mask is a lie you wear on your face"

“Accept that all you can do is change yourself.”

“God is a concept by which we measure our pain” -John Lennon

  The 12th year of the 3rd millennium and of the 21st century, and the 3rd of the 2010s.

  Lease the atmosphere for pixelated messages...

Exercise. Relaxation. Sleep.

Maintain well-being.

Perpetuate quality of life.

Increase resilience.

Help yourself.

Do stuff, then don't.

Sneak out for a break.

Get amongst it.

Grab it.

Be nice to it.

Sort it into genres.

Plan, organise, lead, control.

Flexibility, strength, self-delusion.

Snappy slogans for modern living.

Handy hints for enjoying existence.

Figure out what's important.

The Power of Habit...

Cosmic Glue

No cause for conCERN

All the large Hadron particle collisions paid off! Smashing...

Big ups to the Higgs boson for keeping us all together!

Giving mass to the masses since ages ago.

Found it hiding in some protons.

Inappropriate Timing

Toadstools

Editorial Independence

"I feel a nostalgia for an age yet to come..."

"It's not so much what you didn't say,
but the tone of voice you didn't use,
when I never heard what you didn't say."

Hiding behind words and trying to fool you.

Nonsense is under-rated.

Holiday Panoramas

100 Years Today

...since the birth of Alan Turing.

• code-breaker
• mathematician
• father of modern computing

if not for him then we might not be doing what we're doing right now....

he even got his own google doodle for the day

what an honour

Tango Bravo Lima

Unfortunately history is riddled with exploitaion, greed, slavery, corruption, colonisation etc... but the ones who are trying to tell you that are communist/marxist/socialist types that are only picking the bits of info that suit them... I guess it takes too long to explain, but they are right but the masses will never believe them!

a bit like the matrix, but it's just credit/debt instead of a plug in the back of ya head, but they may get the technology for that soon and give it a try...

But I guess that is not something you want to dwell on for to long, it's not the sort of thought that will get you through a hard day at the coalface. But I guess a challenge there for us to try and break the cycle, depending on your level of cynicism.

Power to the people. Right on!

Third-party Loophole

Hash-tag Activism

Brand Ambassador
Chequebook Legislation

Integrated Marketting
Commercial Loyalty

Encouraged Apathy
Ingrained Misinformation

Corporate Manslaughter

Inherited Privilege

If I was being polite I would say monarchies are irrelevant, quaint or redundant.

Remnants of a time of 'Divine rule', powerful dynasties and dominant bloodlines.

But really they are a celebration of inequality and blind allegiance to authority.

Isn't it time for taxpayers to stop funding the lives of the rich and famous?

How can Britain justify spending so much on Diamond Jubilee activities for Queen Liz (...and the Olympics come to think about it), when they are in a time of grave austerity and can't afford public services. Raising the costs of tertiary education, reducing welfare entitlements, reducing corporate accountability, weakening labour protection laws. Deregulation for Murdoch mates and other stuff to help the banks and screw the masses. Everybody just laps it up. As if I needed another reason to hate Paul McCartney and all the other chumps on stage waving inanely and thanking the old dear. Ok that last bit is a tad overly negative, but really I am critical of the way the majority of the western world just swallows it all down. Classless warfare.

Transit of Venus

Completely Unconnected Randomness:


Excess Breath Alcohol
Opiate of the masses
Austerity v Stimulus
Oh sweet nothing
Highly Observant
A plethora of poo
Empty platitudes
Feed the ducks
Words losing all meaning
Back to the bad old days
Poorly conceived visual analogies

Seditious Thoughts

Burn the truth
Slash the state
Resist the Urge
Stop the party
Nah, just kidding eh

Revenge is never a good thing, but I always want it!
Feels like retribution is a substitute for justice
not a source of satisfaction for the avenger
But it just seems like some people or fictional characters
would deserve a good kicking, but where is the line?
vengeance, karma, retribution, viscous cycles
It's a slippery slope

Ultimate Insult

What's the scenario?

(a) voice
(b) time
(c) mission
(d) star


(a) enter
(b) space
(c) violation
(d) social


(a) movement
(b) science
(c) security
(d) dichotomy


(a) party
(b) cosmic
(c) Thesaurus
(d) charm


(e) sick session
(f) silver tsunami


Felt it?

Subtle Melodrama

Beyond redemption?
Is there such a thing?
A point where rehab is impossible?
Is capital punishment ever necessary?
Do we allow cycles to continually dictate everything?

Constant Stimulation

= flexible labour market = lack of collective bargaining = low wages = lack of collective bargaining = 

Unrelated  non-sentiments:

I read an article the other day about an Iranian dude on the run, that they referred to as the "Salman Rushdie of Rap" or "Rushdie of Music". Because he has had a fatwa placed upon him, due to his lyrics challenging the religious rulers of the Islamic republic. etc. etc... Anyway the term "Rushdie of Rap" made me think of alternative personality-career-cross-overs, such as:

• "The Pythagoras of Painting"
• "The Nostradamus of Weather-forecasting"
• "The Brittany Spears of Politics"
• "The Bowie of Brain Surgery"
• "The Bart Simpson of Media Ownership"
• "The Machiavelli of male Modelling"
• "The Adolph Hitler of Parking Enforcement" 
• "The Jesus of Professional Sport"
• "The Scrooge McDuck of Finance Ministers"
• "The Michael Bay of Party-organisation"
• "The Richard Branson of stamp collecting"
• "The M.C Hammer of Empire Building"
• "The Jon Stewart of Line-dancing"
• "The Orwell of Ornithology"
• "The Colbert of Colonoscopy"
• "The Oprah of Telemarketing"
• "The Mel Gibson of Thumb-wrestling"
• "The Will Smith of Sandcastle-Building"

How to wreck a nice beach?

Steampunk

Shower Scene: (experiment in extremely-short storytelling)

Gavin turned on the shower and watched as the water fell suddenly to the whiteness below. Splashing quickly then sliding down the drain out of sight like it had been waiting ready for that exact moment. An army of H2O propelling itself forward, each soldier parachuting out to accomplish its mission. He often had silly thoughts like this while he waited for things, it seemed like life involved a lot of 'waiting', where you can't do anything for one moment or so, then the system reboots gifting you a million options but bugger all time to use them. The water reached maximum hotness, so he adjusted the temp to just the right status and jumped on in.

After the initial acclimatisation and joy of the hot water, the shampoo and soap routine can begin. Showers are one of those simple pleasures that never gets boring, just one of those mindless daily things we all do and never find the need to really discuss. Because, well, the aim is simple: get clean. Not something you need to over-think. But that is one of those nice wee ironies of life, over-thinkers don't get to choose what they over-think about. So on the odd occasion they may find that they end up analysing the mundane, the banal, the stuff that everybody else just got on with, without being curious. It didn't happen all the time of course, but sporadically Gavin would get stuck in obscure thoughts. Like when did people first start taking showers and how serious historically, were humans, about hygiene. Apparently only a few generations back whole families shared bathwater, but in modern times it seems almost abnormal not to shower daily. Not that he'd done a survey or anything, but he could just tell by looking around at the people in his office that with the amount of bodily preparation they attended to they must shower everyday to achieve this. Sometimes he could skip a day on a weekend, but never more than one in a row, his hair and by default his forehead just got too greasy for his liking. This was partially behind the reasoning for his new 'shower at night' routine, which was current being trialled. You see if Gavin washed his hair in the morning before work, he felt like it went a bit dry and sort of fluffy, which he disliked. But if he didn't wash it his hair would get a bit oily. So the solution that seemed to work was to wash it at night and then wake up with bed hair, but because his hair was quite short the bed hair looked like it was meant to be that way.

He realised his mind had drifted off as he finished washing the remaining soap off and getting those last few blasts of hot water at the face. In a moment he would unfortunately turn the water off and reach out for the towel located close by. Dry off and go to bed. But for some reason it just seems more natural to shower in the morning, he guessed because he uses it as a way to wake up...

add/rewrite?

Alan Partridge Ah-haa

Knowing me, knowing you:

insulting the guests

and accidentally alienating the audience

In the funniest way possible!

Was just explaining to someone the other day, 

how funny that was.

Hook Me Up

Without a fixed point of anchor, we would all drift out to sea...
I'm worse off by myself, I prefer your help

Play. Film. Story. Project. War. Meal.

Famous for being  famous
Disaster within a disaster
Party inside a party
Crisis sandwich
Emergreme

Palindrome of swirling chaos

I may be a little sad, but I'm not like full blown pissed off

But maybe that would help sometimes...





http://www.cyberspike.com/clarke/chicktow.html

Honey and Vinegar Realty

the tackiness of commerce
we all just let it happen...
won't let you trick me twice
the inevitability of economic progress
the intention to continue to be
some gave all, all gave some
drift to oblivion

I don't know what I want but i want it now
don't be sorry, just be better.

we have things to do before we sleep

don't stop me now
keep it unreal

"All hobbies suck, but if you stick at it for long enough you might kill some precious time."
"Coin collecting is just like life, it stopped being fun a long time ago."
-Homer J. Simpson

Empathy vs. Sympathy vs. Apathy

“So far, I am having real trouble making up names for my characters. Ok I am actually also having trouble giving the characters characteristics too. Then it’s thinking of what will happen to them… like do I make it plot driven or character driven? Everything has to have an arc, doesn’t it?”

Steve was pondering starting his creative written exercises again, but he didn’t know where to start. Tony breathed out his bong hit and passed it back to Steve. But before he started his next toke Steve continued with his frustration:

“Like does everything have to be significant? I know my dialogue is gonna sound phony as hell, and when I use the word phony, I’m always tempted to throw a couple of goddamns in there… and I haven’t even read ‘catcher’ in years.” He was about to light up but instead continued his thought rant.

“Like do I try to give them names that mean something or just make them into strong characters, so that that carries the meanings I want to express? But if I keep up all this overthinking, I will never start writing anything, that’s all I know for sure right now.”

They were sitting on the couch again, talking about what they could be doing; instead of actually doing it, as debate and conjecture seemed far easier than actually doing stuff. It was just after sunset and they had finished work for the day. As Steve finally had his next toke, Tony broke the conversational silence. “I always wanted to name a character ‘Dean Moriarty’, but would that be pretentious?” He blurted out.

Steve almost choked in a mild fit of laughter. Then sniped back...

“Pretentious? Why don’t you just write a list of the books you’ve read instead, or name your work: ‘Please Associate Me with Kerouac, ‘cos he was Famous.’  You have only read ‘On The Road” anyway.”

Tony was only ever so slightly embarrassed at Steve’s derision.  And chimed back “Have you ever tried to read his other stuff? I just don’t have a big enough pharmaceutical collection to find the significance of a drunken Buddhist.”

                “Harsh call bro” Retorted Steve.

                “No I don’t mean the man no disrespect or anything like that. I mean, I guess you need to have a harsh life or some pretty heavy shit go down on you, before you can really write what you feel. And same goes for understanding it, like you can sympathise all you like, but you’ll never really empathise with the truth of it all.” Tony's' thoughts seemed to trail off into the distance as he realised the significance of his own statement. Steve took over the conversation, back on his own train of thinking. “It seems like it would be way easier to write a song or a comic, than write a whole book. I mean you can just sketch the outlines and let people pile whatever meaning they want into your holes of ambiguity. But with a novel you have to give the reader almost everything. Usually a backstory, strong character types that English teachers can analyse in 50 years’ time and a plot that perfectly unfolds slowly throughout the chapters and then draws you right in at the end. It’s just too much to think about, and I don’t even know what I want my characters to say or do. I don’t even know what message I want to give my audience, if any.”

Tony tried to tame this burden of significance that Steve was creating. “Maybe you could just start with a short story with two characters, having a bit of a chat?’”

                “Well I could do that, but who the fuck would want to read that kind of bollocks Tony?”

                “Just stick it up on the internet somewhere, there’s so many bored people out there looking for distractions from their own dramas, they will read anything. Well you know what I mean.”

                “Cheers man, that is like ultra-comforting indeed. I can imagine the critical comments that would generate. I mean have you noticed how much everyone seems to argue on the net? It’s like everyone just enjoys having a big whinge and a tearing other people’s ideas down these days. Or just blatantly insulting people for perceived homosexuality or that whole 'go-back-to-where-you-come-from' crap.”

                “I told you not to read the comments on YouTube dickhead.  Haters always gonna hate dude. Can't stop that, like war and glaciers. Death and taxes... But anyway, forget the criticism, I mean everyone has to start from somewhere, even if your first few attempts are absolute bullshit. ”

                “I repeat ultra –comforting man, have you thought of being a guidance counsellor or something? The general enthusiasm generating machine you are!”

                “I already work in a call centre; everyone unloads their emotional shit all over you, even if they have called the wrong phone number.”  

They both started laughing and looked outside as a plane flew off into the distance. “But in all seriousness how awesome would it be to create characters, people actually cared about?”

“I’m sure they will have shitty names though.  Or just sound like it's me having a conversation with myself in my head though, so what’s the point in reading or even writing that? I will just try for total deconstruction anyway. Pulling all the atoms apart, without ever fixing a molecule. Words slicing through the pretence but really just in a practice way, anyway. With no greater meaning keeping it together, just a grab-bag cluster of extinct references of stuff from the previous century and occasionally this one. Boring!”

“Dude, who are you?”

“Founding member of over-thinkers anonymous.”

“Nuff said…” They smiled at the dusk and thought of the hills and beyond, in the least cheesiest way possible, but no plot twists ensued for fear of clichéd overuse and it definitely wasn't all a dream.   

Social Critic

Going Viral...

A note I found from a while ago said:

Life is Beautiful

Perception is Reality

Parihaka not Guy Fawkes

Investigate the Truth

Question Authority

Be the best you can

Other stuff I wrote down said:

Gotta love material wealth

In an urban context

Pump and Dump

We all just let it happen...

Won't let you trick me twice

Nostalgia just ain't the same these days...

Enjoy the Journey!

Life is Messy

Don't worry so much,

about the past

and the future

Live in the now.

Boredom or suffering?

Your choice

Capture the Flag

...greater good my ass!

we all in it for the fame, wealth, status, kudos...

you got it the money...

self-aggrandizement, the usual.

we're all against each other...

divisions, tribalism, factions, the elite

isolated pockets of snobbery

out of touch with the real world...

common folk and their revolting decay.

unable to access even modest...

ostentatious displays of wealth

or way to tell everyone to get fucked.

we have it, you don't

we spent it, give us more

too bad, it's gone

the rich don't wanna share

the poor take til it hurts

sweat it out

take a concrete pill and harden up

workers of the world invite...

credit cards, banks, markets, government and the rest

to rule over us stylishly

with awesome news channels

with the best celebrity updates

that's current affairs baby!

analysis of fashion trends

the nitty-gritty questions

and other ways we can spend more

fuck the less well off, they deserve it

orphans, how did u lose both parents...

bit suspicious isn't it? or just careless

sick, tired and/or elderly...

we have pills to sort that out

the huddled masses

watching through the windows...

see: game shows, teeth whitener, fake tans

reality is sponsored by breweries

the implied solutions can be bought

big TVs, alcohol and a constant stream...

of 24-hour infotainment devoid of journalism

or facts, charm, integrity, courage

after the break

something to keep you tuned in

sustain your interest through the ads

has to be new and fresh for our cynical souls

irony is invisible to those inside it

here are some new ways to think/control you

but they are very similar to the old ones

so don't get your hopes up

this just in: follow the leaders or pay the price

did you see what she was wearing?

followed by sports and distracting statistics

Attention Economy

Sometimes it feels like the wheels are falling off...

or we are going down in flames...

like we are swimming in a vast ocean and may never get to land...

there is no cure for life...

and no such thing as total control...

just keep swimming no matter how tempting it is to stop...

things don't always seem worthwhile when we do them...

someday we'll look back and smile...

darkness doesn't have be a bad thing...

we all act out of fear...

no comment...

see you there...

Purple Monkey Dishwasher

Endorphins
Serotonin
Dopamine

All can distort our perceptions of reality or ‘now’

Create your own meaning(s)...


Justice For All*

(*conditions apply)

Professor Professorson

Creativity and Authenticity…

Are these things to strive for?

Well I would say yes, but modern society/culture doesn’t seem quite so sure…

The other challenge is to do so without being…

Pretentious and self-indulgent

a challenge for some

What does it mean to exist right now?

Positive thoughts/thinking

Looking at the bright side

A grateful perspective

Remembering it could have been worse

Etc.

If you believe it, you can make it so

We create our own reality daily

From the unconscious to the conscious

Positivity attracts positivity

Negativity attracts negativity

and vice versa

Message I got from a fortune cookie today:

"Win with humility; lose with grace"

simple but affective and easy to forget...

Spiritual Transformation

Transcendental Mediation

Transcontinental Meditation

Post-modern Speculation

has nothing to do with this...

________________________________________________________________

Yeah

It’s all about perspective eh!!

There’s only one person that can decide how you feel and that’s you!

So I have decided to feel good and be positive about all the opportunities I will get

If I feel sad about it, then it just isn’t gonna help anyone, especially me!

________________________________________________________________

Yeah well I am not saying it’s easy…

But some days you just feel ‘good’ for no real reason

But of course other days you feel bad for no reason aswell

Other times there are plenty of reasons…

But underneath it all the choice of how you process/deal with it

Is a choice that we have… we choose our perspective and so that dictates our moods…

But I guess I don’t get periods though,…

so I can’t judge how I would ‘handle’ the feelings that they create…

________________________________________________________________

(she agreed:)

Think it’s a matter of constantly reminding self of the fact that there is a choice on how you deal with how you feel…

Haha, yeah well, I guess it’s one of those things, it’s almost like women are given an ‘excuse’ not to deal with how they feel at that time… cos dealing can be hard! Heh J

We are just on a constant path of self-improvement / awareness etc!

________________________________________________________________

Yes that is a good summary of it really!!

We get so distracted with detail and trivialities, that we forgot to choose how we feel

An let ourselves fall into old habits of negativity and pessimism unnecessarily

so there

Ribs and Rumps

We all see what we want to see...

What is the point?

Is there a point?

Does there need to be one?

Who has the point?

When did the point?

Why do I do this?

How do you do this?

Where?

Am I ever serious?

Am I ever not?

I AM

I guess I need to pick my battles...

but it's always so tough at the time

and easy in hindsight

darn you over-thought police!

Whoops

I pulled everything apart

again

it's ok

I usually put most of it back together

again

Feedback loop

The Ravenous Hordes

We are all deluded, that's normal

Memories change the more we remember them.

We will try to find meaning from all things, even if it's not there.

The more you play, the more you learn.

We make rapid decisions based on limited information, everyday.

I may not appear in my own profile pic, but I'm in the background on other peoples...

Friendly Fire

Sometimes to create things you have to make a bit of a mess.

Or have a few attempted versions before a success.

I guess life is a bit like that when you're trying to improve.

Sorry if you were around when I was making a mess

but I feel like I'm getting it sorted far better now.

I wish I could stop my brain thinking sometimes though.

But I guess it's better than not being able to do so...

This isn't always going to entertain or stimulate you

as it's a just a way for me to remember my weirdness

I'll still give it a go though

I just document the non-existent

So you're welcome to come along for the ride :)

NB: Oh crap my photo uploads have gone weird again

trying to get that sorted...